Begin to notice the different parts within you, and how they affect your thoughts and emotions.
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All of us have many parts inside of us. Our lifetime of experience lives within our body and brain and informs the way we see and respond to the world. If you think of a set of nesting dolls, each of our major ages/experiences in our lives is wired into our nervous system. This means that during any given moment or interaction, we could (and usually do) have multiple ages of ourselves that each have a different perspective and tools and may have different goals and intended outcomes! Part of the process of healing and transformation is to begin to learn about and befriend these younger parts.
This activity is most effective if you have read Your Inner Child and Internal Family Systems. You can also improve this activity by doing Creating Your Just Right Place guided audio practice and checking in with your littles.
Think of an experience, interaction or behavior that felt upsetting, unsettling or you feel is getting in your way of how you want to show up in the world. See if you can bring back the memory and/or feelings and answer the questions below.
How did it feel in my body? What was my mood or state of mind? Was there or is there a physical posture that expresses that mood? If I repeat that posture, can I feel that state?
What thoughts or voice(s) do I hear in my head about this? Does this voice sound like anyone I have known in my life? What is the tone of this voice (e.g. judgmental, angry, scared, or irritated.) Does this voice or thought remind me of anyone or a particular time in my life?
How does this voice make me feel? Where do I feel this in my body? How old do I feel?
Is this thought/feeling familiar? If so, when else do I notice it?
Give this part a name based on the qualities or actions you notice. In the following week, see if you notice this part coming up in similar situations. Add more information to your map as you discover it.
Going deeper: Usually when we have situations that activate young parts there will be more than one, often at least one of each of the above categories. Remember IFS uses the name Internal Family Systems for a reason! Who else – what other parts of you - are active in your example situation/behavior? As you were going through the prompts did you notice any contradictory voices or sensations? If not, notice now if you settle and breathe, are there other parts of you that want attention? You can use the same prompts to map them out.
Check out this personal Spotify playlist, specially created for this activity by Jules.
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